sitting here in this empty room.
wishing it was just a little fuller.
wanting everything to be just a little fuller.
thinking about what’s to come.
regretting what never did.
praying for a little more my way.
releasing what has built up.
beginning to continue building.
being ready for the breakdown.
blowing myself up so big.
crying that i can’t deflate.
begging to avoid explosion.
knowing that i should be busy.
doing things that will never matter.
procrastinating on life entirely.
knowing that tomorrow i will regret today.
understanding that i will hate tomorrow.
dreading to dread the day after.
trying to be almost ready to accept this.
beginning to understand life on life’s terms.
wondering when my own terms begin to apply.
